Sunday, June 21, 2015

So it's been a couple weeks..

That's because on June 5th I went on a first date with this guy I met online Robby. It was like fireworks. For both of us it seems, and in all the chaos my life is in right now, he still really likes me. I haven't even dated much more than the previous few weeks since my ex of 9 years and I split a couple years back.

I never expected to find this right now in my life. But it is really early. But by 33 you kind of know your deal breakers... And it all matches. I don't know what else to say about it. I've been in touch with the new therapist about it. She's just all about us staying slow. We do. Somewhat. But we have fun, and he makes me feel normal, not the weird place in the world I exist right now...

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

The new therapist...

Against all efforts I am still annoying the piss out of cutie Matthew. It is subsiding though, I think yesterday was the worst of all days... That sucks.. I'm just pissed because I am the girl he liked chatting with, I had no idea I would have a sudden trigger and go supermanic speed texting on him... And I tried to keep things slow with him. Guess I got a capital F there. We really seemed to have the conversational chemistry, something you don't always have online..

So life goes on. I literally arrived to my therapy appointment sweating bullets from biking it to the office. At least I was 30 minutes early, enough timw to walk around to find a can of Pepsi I felt guilty spending $1 on. I had the report my former therapist had written for my disability claim, my own history I had written up to about to lose my job, considering I have a psych history that goes back to 16.

I talked about my recent episode and where I'm restarting from. At the end she said, and after having gone through all that, here you sit still able to smile. I responded, I am an achiever, I'll get to where I need to be.

We ended the session, she pumped a fist through the air stating, as long as we have this from you, we'll get there :)